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Dear Zelda,
How is it to be a princess?
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Dear anonymous,
What's it like, huh? Well I mean it's a lot of what you see in the movies. I have a father who is the king. I get many suitors. I have a knight that aids to my needs. I mean if that's what you want to call Link and all of that. Quite frankly he doesn't know any of the codes of honor.
I do too! There's benevolence! And Faith! Humility, integrity, loyalty, patience and mercy!
You got that from the internet...didn't you.
Well, there's also the knights code of resourcefulness, clearly.
I've never heard such a code.
Well there IS!
Mmmhmm. Sure, Link. See what I mean reader?
SHUT UP.
Zelda Marth and Link
Is there some times snow in Hyrule?
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Dear idiot,
...
Did you NOT see snow in Zora's Domain? Yes, it does.
Zelda
Zelda and link
Zelda why don’t u just give link a kiss after all the times he has saved Hyrule and your self u owe him at leash a kiss!
Link just be confident and hag in there u might get the girl in the end u never know =)
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See, Zelda?!
IT'S DESTINY. NOW KISS ME! *puckers up*
...
Zelda What?! THAT'S IT? YOU DON'T EVEN SAY ANYTHING???
...
Sigh. And Link.
Sarah,
We just wanted to say Happy Birthday.... You're probably not going to update the site anymore... But uh, Happy Birthday anyway...
--Huro and Sephiroth
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[webmistress note: You have SO much faith in me. =P But thank you.]
Shows what little YOU know, elf boy.
Zelda
Dear Zelda (& Link)
First I will ask Zelda something since this is HER page. Ok here I go! Now there are a TON of Ledgend of Zelda games out there...but they all star Link as your playing character. If it is a game with your name in the title shouldnt you be the playable character? It's sexist I swear. If you made a game what would it be about and what do you think your main moves would be?
Ok now my second question goes to Link! In the Four swords game...why did you look so weird did you just like come outta the closet or was it some freak accident? I mean your hair was freakin pink!
And that is all keep up the good work and try not to get into to much trouble Zelda and Link. Maybe you should carry mase on you Zelda then you wouldnt get kidnapped so much X3 lol
~Saru~
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Dear Saru,
Well it's not like they don't give me my times to shine. I get a cool theme song played for me everytime I show up. Plus I'm featured in other Nintendo games such as Super Smash Brothers Melee.
*snickers*
...
What do you find so incredibly amusing?
Not to mention that gay ass game they featured you in, to go save Link...ha...haha..HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HEY! Don't make fun of her! Wait..what game?
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
...
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
OH MAN! LOOK AT THIS ONE!
THAT'S HER FATHER!!!
SHUT UP.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
[Webmistress note: I like how they don't even answer questions at this point.]
Zelda Roy Link
Dear Zelda,
I hate to bagger, but your lack of updates makes me a sad panda. A very sad panda.
Love, Acco(The distressed Kenshin obsessed girl)
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Dear Acco,
Sarah got off her lazy ass! YAY IT IS A MIRACLE.
Zelda
Dear zelda
How in the hell does marth n roy get to hyrule if they live in some distant world? Oh and by the way you left your bra at my house
Love(since i know you do) Miroku
P.S Don't tell sango.!.
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Dear Miroku,
Well you know what with the wild party and all, I sorta forget things. SUE ME.
YOU DID WHAT?! LEFT...A...BRA?!
IT WASN'T LIKE THAT.
HAHAHAHA! Zelda's in TROUBLEEEEE.
[webmistress note: Roy has been suspended for the next two weeks due to...being him.]
Zelda
dearest zelda,
i have been in love with you since the first day i saw you. your beautiful eyes and flowing hair have filled my dreams for many years now. i own every episode of your television show, even the ones where your path crossed with captain n and his princess. let me tell you that you are all over princess lana hands down. i cant take my eyes off of you. i cant stop thinking about you. i have finally decided to come out and say it: zelda *gets down on one knee and withdraws a 2 carat diamond ring* will you marry me?
our days will be filled with food, conversation, and fun and our nights will be filled with sexual ecstacy! i cannot wait for you to read this message and finally accept me as your loving husband.
your loyal subject, JD
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Dear JD,
I post this, because I need at least ONE love letter for each page ya know? Anyway...JD, huh? I've never met you a day in my life. So that means you watch me from the BUSHES! STALKER!
I just heard the "stalker" alarm. Is everything okay?
Yeah. *points to JD*
*"kindly" removes him*...*dusts off hands*
See? He's good for something.
What?
Zelda and Link
Dear Zelda,
I am prince Vira of the kingdom Knile. I have read many of the pages of the Ask Zelda letters and questions. I am thankful to have finally written you considering my busy schedule. I am much like Link and Roy for I save my kingdom from the destructive power of evil. I have looked at maps of Hyrule and it is indeed beautiful. I especially love Lake Hyrule, It is truly beautiful. Yet, not as beautiful as you.*blushes* I wish I could come to visit your kingdom and meet link as well as you. My kingdom is just as beautiful as yours to. *smiles a bit* It has a lake and a beach, It has many mountains and fields, and a few small towns of many different sentient species. Now Link in one of the letters you sent someone you said you didn't have a license to ride a horse. Would you like me to give you specially certified certificate to allow you to ride one? that way you don't ride Epona illegally. Now I have a question for you Zelda. Do you take picture requests?
Sincerely, Prince Vira
P.S. I am sending you a beautiful, and trained, White stallion with this letter.
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Uh...*looks left and right, kinda whispers* You gotta like...ship UPS or something for shit like this, man. I didn't want to show Zelda the dead horse cause it would like, make her scream you know? So uh...next time think of that pal. *nudges* See ya.
Link
In the windwaker, you were a pirate. You could of been any girl in the game instead of a pirate. WHY DID YOU CHOOSE A PIRATE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
From jasmine the ninja
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Dear Jasmine,
So why are you a girl, and a ninja? I mean ninjas are fags. Big...big fags. Pirates for life.
Zelda
To Link, (I only use "Dear" for Marth ^.^)
Have you even considered actually being romantic to Zelda in order to get her to notice you? I mean, all you do now is tag along and overbearingly badger her with your tactless infatuations...
C'mon now Link, you're a legendary hero! You're supposed to be dashing and romantic. Take some tips from Marth, he knows what to do about these things.
And Marth... I'm still waiting on those pictures we took together to develop. Do you want them in the public e-mail box, or your private one, since they might not be... intended for other eyes, hmm? ~.^
Signed, Sephiroth
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Dear Sepiroth,
Hey, would you try to kiss a piranha? It's the same concept. I don't want to lose my lips or something..*coughs* more important. You know?
Wait..is he trying to say that she gives he-
WHAT?!
Ooh! Sweethear- I mean Sepiroth. Uh, yeah...send those pictures privately. I mean, we don't need hackers looking at our images, right?!
Oh man, I'm so disgusted now...
Zelda Marth and Link
Dear Zelda
This is going to be really really random but what would Link look like as a girl? I also asked it to my friend leron too and she doesn't know. I thought you would know and I know your going to laugh because I am (laugh out loud XD)
Jenny o_O
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Dear Jenny,
Sadly...he'd look like me, really.
SADLY? Man, I would be so HOT!! I'd touch myself everyda-
OH DIN SHUT UP! *screams*
Zelda and Link
Dear Marth,
You have another fan!!!! And to prove it, I just would like to give you a small gift for friendship. * hands Marth a sparking ruby box * Inside is a hand-made tiara, out of pure 24 carrot gold, with a sapphire gem for the stone on the top! I hope you like it, because now I am officially broke. But oh well, it was worth it! * smiles * I hope you enjoy, and I promise you will be hearing more questions/comments VERY soon! (And just to tell you, I think you can kick Link and Roy's but any day!)
A huge Marth fan, Akhekhu
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Oh man...
It's so good to be me.
Marth
Zelda:
Hope all is well.
Have three questions.
1. Will I get a new boyfriend. 2. Will I win a lottery? 3. Will I be successful in the new business ventures.
Please reply when you can.
Thank You. Francine
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Dear Francine,
What do I look like? A crystal ball?
You look round like one...OOOH BURN!
...
Zelda and Roy
dear zelda
i was wondering if you could give me links phone number i think he'a really hot
from wolfie
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Dear wolfie,
867-5309 *winks and mouths "call me"*
Link
Dear link,
*hug* I your biggest fan ya!
Mandy the eagle girl
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Look at that, man...
I even got flying chicks after me. I'm so hot.
...
You wish, "man".
Zelda and Link
Geodude,
Geo dude dude dude geo geo geo? dude geodudegeo dudegeo goedude?geodude -_- geo geo dude dude
geodude, gdodude
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Dear geodude,
Don't make me sic my squirtle on you.
Zelda
Dear Zelda,Link,andGanondorf
Link:are you mad that tom nook sells the master sword in animal crossing wild world?
Zelda:i bet ur mad that peach has her own game now *hides under desk*
Ganondorf:i have some sdvice for u:don't get mad,get glad
signed, Billy Joehanson Fredric the 4563457365373rd
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Dear Billy,
Peach is still a whore. Game or not.
Hah, you're jealous. Just admit it.
*smirk*
I am NOT jealous of that hussy! She has no shame in herself. Flying around on an umbrella and letting all of Din's creation glance under her skirt!
Dude..someone give me her flight pattern!
*slaps Roy*
I like how you guys never bother to answer the questions anymore. Hah.
Zelda Marth Roy and Link
kiero mucho porno tuyo
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Dear "Senor",
Rotten Spanish aside, you are a sick man.
Zelda
I'm young and I love some one,
what should I do?
No one
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Dear No one,
You only live once. Tell the person. If they don't like you, well you're young...you'll find someone else, I'm sure.
Zelda
DEAR LINK,
I DON’T GET YOU
I MEAN TONGUE!!
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Dear Annonymous,
*gulp*
Wow, I think that's so hot.
ZELDA! I mean....you do? *winks*
Man, what a fag.
Zelda Roy and Link
DEAR LINK [NO 1 ELSE READ THIS]
I LOVE YOU WILL YOU MARRY ME I AM ALREADY POWERFULL AND PLUSS IM A WITCH NICE WITCH
PPPPLLLLLEEEEEAAAAAASSSSSSEEEE
LOVE SNOOPY
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Look at that, man...
I even got witches after me.
I'm so hot.
*slaps her forehead*
Zelda and Link
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